177255

Joke of the Day

"Q: What's the difference between God and fighter pilots? A: God doesn't think he's a fighter pilot."

"Why was the young boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face"

"Did you know the government can drug test our water supply?! That's why I never piss near a toilet. Instead - I piss on your mom. Shes by the trash.... (not the toilet)"

"What's the difference between a light bulb and a pregnant woman? You can unscrew a light bulb!"

"Cat burglar: Quietly steals all your valuables Dog burglar: Eats your ham, sleeps in bed with you for awhile, wakes you up to go out at 3am"

"GUYS! You'll never guess what I just did for a Klondike Bar! I took my wallet out of my back pocket and gave the cashier $1.29, plus tax."

"Earlier today I saw the Facebook group 'kids vs cancer' Well, it turns out writing ""my money is on cancer every time"" is one way to get quite a bit of hate mail."

"Great. Ban gay marriage. Remember what happened during Prohibition? Now we're going to have everyone making bathtub gay marriages."

"A priest and a rabbi are walking in the park. The priest turns to the rabbi and asks, ""How much do you charge for circumscisions?"" The rabbi responds, ""They're free, but I get to keep the tips."""

"Guy walks into a bar Metal bar. Ouch"