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Joke of the Day
"Are you a beaver? ...'cuz damn."
Next Joke
"What's blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint"
"My therapist keeps telling me to stop dating women who believe in the healing powers of crystals and I'm all like, ""Nope."""
"So let me get this straight, a 747 can carry a space shuttle on its ""back"", and yet airlines charge for overweight baggage?"
"My cat acts pretty tough for someone who disappears for 3 days anytime I sneeze."
"What do you call the rapid growth of Indian cities? Turbanisation"
"The best part about being a grown-up is not having to answer to ANYONE! (What's that, honey? Be right there.)"
"Last night for Halloween, I saw exactly 12 people dressed like Eleven. I know this because after the 9th 11, I swore I'd never forget."
"I was in a gang once. We wore blue, traveled in packs, and ruled our turf with shiny instruments...wait. Band. I was in the marching band."
"Hey man, your mom is like snack... Free-to-lay... I don't know..."