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Joke of the Day

"Um, hi. How much is the rent for this amazing apartment? Ma'am, this is the wine aisle of the grocery store."

"dont judge a book by its cover. dont judge a book at all. read a book. write a book. dont judge a book unless that book has murdered someone"

"Looking at our latest Comcast bill and I can only pray that our daughter has zero aspirations for college"

"The news report was that an elevator for the coal shaft broke down, trapping 27 workers But it was just a miner inconvenience"

"Did you hear about the sequel to ""The Thing""? Turns out one of Jackie Chan's Relatives is directing it. His Uncle, I believe. &nbsp; He's calling it ""ONE *MORE* THING!"""

"If youre ever cold, stand in a corner. Most corners are 90 degrees."

"Why was the policeman sent to talk to a bunch of crows? Because someone said there was a ""murder""."

"Have you heard the joke about the butter? Never mind you would spread it around"

"Teens today stuck inside all day long playing video games. In my day, we spent all day outside smoking hash oil & cigarettes with friends."

"I imagine by now all you Evian drinkers have read the name backwards?"