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Joke of the Day

"If we help Kurdistan attack ISIS... they could become WASWAS"

"I'm starting a mirror cleaning business. Its a job I can really see myself doing!!"

"What do you call that mean guy who keeps waking you up? A myoclonic jerk."

"nice try walmart, like im gonna spend $20 on a skeleton mask when i could easily just peel the flesh and muscle off my face for free"

"I'm going to need to see a warrant before you look through any pictures on my phone besides the one I show you."

"Once an American asked a Mexican.. ""What separates dogs and Mexicans?"" The Mexican said, ""A border""."

"What do you call a PHD in religious studies? Gods doctor."

"Enrages me when I see guys using cute dogs to pick up chicks. It's like, why did I have kids."

"What's the difference between a whale and a toaster? You didn't pop out of a toaster."

"Mr Monster: Oi hurry up with my supper. Mrs Monster: Oh do be quiet I've only got three pairs of hands."