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Joke of the Day

"Why do so many girls wear sweaters that say 'SuperDry'... It's not like us boys wear sweaters saying 'micropenis'"

"I will be tweeting telepathically today. So if you think of something funny, that was me."

"""You know what this sexist comment needs? Acoustic guitar."" -country music"

"There is absolutely nothing funnier than yelling ""HE'S STEALING MY BABY!"" at a dad having a hard time with his kid in public."

"Why would you chase a waterfall? They don't move to different spots you know. It's pretty much just right there."

"""Y dnt u Muslims tell ISIS to stop"" Ok hold up *pulls out iphone* ""Yo ISIS habibi,its me plz stop"" ISIS:""ok habibi sorry,shisha tonight?"""

"A man was arrested for having sex inside a West Virginian Olive Garden with an employee. Apparently he took ""When you're here, you're family"" too literally."

"What did the Giant say after he ate Tonga? 'I want Samoa!'"

"If horses could talk I reckon they'd mostly just say 'Get off me'."

"What happens when a role playing game has no nudity in it? Ubisoft"