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Joke of the Day

"Why do so many girls wear sweaters that say 'SuperDry'... It's not like us boys wear sweaters saying 'micropenis'"

"My ex-wife was deaf. She left me for a deaf friend of hers To be honest, I should have seen the signs."

"Lorde wrote her Grammy nominated album at age 14. My son is 13 and has let the bathtub overflow twice while he was sitting INSIDE of it."

"I tried ""Netflix and chill?"" on my wife. We're now on season 3 of Gilmore Girls."

"Why was the guitar teacher arrested? Because he fingered a minor."

"Guys with balls hangin from ur truck. that would mean ur truck is a man,yes? Which means you like to be inside a dude all day. Lol homo. : p"

"Why is it dangerous for a lawyer to walk onto a construction site when plumbers are working? Because they might connect the drain line to the wrong suer."

"(sees someone doing a texas chainsaw massacre) um can you not"

"The Jewish Dilemma... Free Pork"

"I'm in a long distance relationship. My girlfriend's in the future."