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Joke of the Day

"What is Sacha Baron Cohen's favorite ion? Borate."

"If I washed my dick 100 times, would you suck it? -No? -You dirty cocksucker you."

"Q: What did the tree say to the mountain? A: Stop peaking at me."

"the only exercise this month ive done is running out of money"

"When you're with the right person, you feel the perfect balance of happy and horny."

"Boys are cute how they're all ""I like girls that don't wear heavy makeup"" and ""get down from that tree near my window or I'll call the cops"""

"The woman next to me smells SO good, is it weird if I'm like ""What perfume is that, I will literally stop robbing this bank if you tell me""?"

"What is the most tried and true method to getting a small fortune? Start out with a large fortune."

"What would gold say if it could talk? ""A-U"" :|"

"What's the difference between a Priest and Pimples? Pimples don't come on your face until you're at least 13."