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Joke of the Day

"Why did the skeletons start dancing? Because they forgot the g in graveyard."

"What did the lawyers say when they finished their basketball game? Court is adjourned"

"NSFW:Got a handjob from a blind girl last night She said ""You have the biggest dick I've ever put my hands on."" I said ""Nah. You're just pulling my leg."" Originally from r/meanjokes"

"I hate those unrealistic movies where women are friends."

"What do the mafia and a pussy have in common? One slip of tongue, and you're in deep shit."

"A boy said to his father one day, ""Dad, when I grow up I want to be a musician."" His father responded, ""I'm sorry, son, you can't have it both ways."""

"What do you call fruits that aren't allowed to marry? [OC] Cantaloupes."

"A policeman just knocked on the door. He said, ""It looks like your wife has been in an accident..."" I said ""Yes but she has a great personality!"""

"Her: Ok, on 3 lets,say what movie our marriage is most like. 1.. 2.. 3 *simultaneously* Her: THE NOTEBOOK Me: SHAWSHANK REDEMPTIONOTEBOOK"

"[emergency] [super hero appears] GUY: It's Doesn't-Understand-Rhetorical-Questions Man. Boy, am I glad to see you! HERO: I...I don't know"