17519

Joke of the Day

"When I was younger, I always felt like I was a man trapped in a woman's body. Thankfully, it all changed when I was born."

"If I eat lots of preservatives, won't I live longer? No, but you will have a longer shelf life."

"What did Mr T say when asked if he had any wool? Yes sir, yes sir, three bags, fool."

"I once asked my mom about the time I was conceived... ...she replied:"" Son, you were simply a blowjob gone awry."""

"I bought a time machine. I bought a second hand time machine next Tuesday. They don't make them like they're going to anymore."

"If people from Poland are called ""Poles""... ...why aren't people from Holland called ""Holes""?"

"the printer in my office is fondly called Bob Marley it keeps jamming"

"I dressed up as a coprophiliac Taurus to the Halloween party, but got kicked out because apparently it was ""indecent."" Bull-fucking-shit."

"What do you call? What do you call nuts on a wall? Walnuts What do you call nuts on a chest? Chestnuts What do you call nuts on a chin? A dick in the mouth"

"Life sucks when a girlfriend doesn't"