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Joke of the Day

"A woman I met had 13 children all named David. When I asked her how she calls just one of them, she said, ""Oh that's easy; I just call them by their last names."""

Next Joke
 
"""Let's call it a day."" I don't know what else you'd call it. Calling it a turtle would just sound stupid. ""Lets call it a turtle."" See?"
"''Dyslexic man walks into a bra''"
"My dog can predict when an earthquake is going to happen. But television doorbell versus actual doorbell baffles him every time."
"There once was a lady from Madrass... There once was a lady from Madrass Who had a magnificent ass Not pretty and pink as you may think But had long ears and ate grass. Credit: Playboy, circa 1970s"
"I lost my mood ring. I'm not sure how I feel about that."
"11yo son just walked by. If Axe was a drug, I'd be stoned right now."
"A German walks into a bar and asks for a martini. The bartender asks, ""Dry?"" The German replies, ""Nein, just one."""
"I'm gonna steal a bunch of Jesus fish off minivans and then put them back three days later."
"The best cure for dry coughing. Take some laxative. You will not cough, trust me."