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Joke of the Day

"""Let's call it a day."" I don't know what else you'd call it. Calling it a turtle would just sound stupid. ""Lets call it a turtle."" See?"

"Did you hear that the band members of No Doubt have announced they are moving forward without Gwen Stefani. It is reported they will now go by the name ""Some Doubt""."

"I can't believe it's almost 2012 & there isn't a prenatal test to find out if you're gonna have one of those kids who's really into magic."

"My girlfriend asked me to get her something that made her look sexy. I got drunk!"

"Years ago I used to do a lot of drag racing... ...buy I kept tripping in those high heels"

"I was browsing sex toys online today and was shocked to find out how much all of my wife's vibrators cost... She's sitting on a small fortune..."

"How does the Hulk make money? He flips houses."

"I found out today that French fries were weren't created in France. They were created in Greece."

"""Vini Vidi Venti"" --I came, I saw, I ordered the large coffee at Starbucks."

"What's green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table."