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Joke of the Day

"What do martial artist love to drink? WATAAA"

"Listened to some Beethoven last night. And some Lady Gaga today. Now I'm quite confused. Who's the deaf one again?"

"How do you turn tap water into holy water? You boil the HELL out of it! Har har har."

"I recently bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with.. But I've been tripping all day."

"""You're sure you understand stock trading?"" ME: Yep ""Then why (holds up card) did you trade our Google shares for a Charizard?"""

"I pity those who feel the need to brag about themselves to get people's attention. I hate them more than the scratch on my Lamborghini."

"Where is the best place to hide something? The second page of search results of Google"

"What's the difference between a tuna a piano and a pot of glue..? You can tuna piano but you can't piano a tuna What about the pot of glue reddit will ask. Hahahahaha I knew you'd get stuck there"

"It's not funny when a First Lady runs for President. It's Hillary-ous."

"Smells like carrots. Q: What is invisible and smells like carrots? A: Bunny farts."