174097

Joke of the Day

"What do you call two homeless men hitting each other with cardboard? Pillow fight"

"No Twitter crush. I have a twitter boyfriend who I intend to marry and have twitter babies. Then twitter divorce and take all his followers."

"I can't believe rattlesnake warnings are called rattles and not cautionary tails"

"A snare drum and a cymbal fall off a cliff... ba dum PSH!"

"""I don't think Gay Guys should be able to get abortions"" -Me when someone asks me a question that I don't know the answer to."

"Joke from Glasgow What is the best thing you can put in a pie? Your teeth!"

"What do you get if you cross Doc Brown and Jay-Z? 1.21 JiggaWhats"

"I just watched a film about a couple who bought a haunted yoghurt. It's called Paranormal Activia."

"What did one friend say to another on a flight that made him get escorted off of it? (WARNING: PUNNY AS HELL) ""Hi Jack! These airplanes are da bomb!"" how did i do? thought of it a couple days ago."

"I leaked a sex tape of myself 3 months ago. It has 14 hits! Those hits are from me checking to see how many hits it has."