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Joke of the Day

"Chili today, Hot tamale."

"I bet Taylor Swift still believes in Santa Claus."

"Anne Frank's famous last words. Brb, door"

"People always go, ""Why can't there ever be peace in the Middle East?"" We can't even get FIVE DENTISTS to agree on a toothpaste. That's why."

"Whats the difference between Aladdin lamp and women make up - nothing if you rub both you will find a freak"

"Maybe the raccoons threw away something very important. Did you ever think about that you big jerk."

"Why do some birds fly south for the winter? Its to far to walk."

"I'm not that into rape culture It feels too forced."

"Two guys are walking down the street when they see a dog licking his balls. The first guy says, ""Man, I wish I could do that. The second guy says, ""Pet him, maybe he'll let you."""

"Me: in a parallel world I am a huge success Medic: please stop moving your arm so we can get it out of the vending machine"