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Joke of the Day

"Why can't my girlfriend perform at open mic night? Because she's a cover thief."

"Are you 9/11, Gurl? Cuz I would never forget you."

"I bet the cooler math nerds call each other Alge-brahs."

"You say pigs can't fly... but swine flu!"

"Grocery shopping on a diet is easy in Germany.. Just look for the *gluten tag*."

"'Sorry officer but how was I to know that weird noise my car was making was a bicycle stuck in my mudflap?'"

"I'm not an alpha male I'm a male"

"The invention of the jackhammer. . . It was groundbreaking. [Side Note] I have already posted this on /r/badpuns but, that seems inactive so, I decided to repost it here."

"I used to be a circumcist. The pay was shit but I got to keep the tips"

"-Knock knock... -""Who's there?"" - 9/11 -""9/11 who?"" -You said you'd never forget!"