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Joke of the Day

"Why dont they use phone books in China? Because they have so many Wing's and Wong's That they might Wing the Wong Numba!!!"

"Received a call from a recruitment consultant. She said to me: ""Sir I have two openings for you...!"" I replied : Yes. I know There was a long silence and then she said..... bastard"

"I'll stop at nothing to avoid using negative numbers."

"I bet there are at least a few seconds when a tiger is chasing you where you look back and are like, ""awwww..."""

"How can you make your d bigger? CAPS LOCK"

"What's the difference between a teacher and a conductor on the railroad? One trains the mind the other minds the train."

"""I have $50, less than an hour, and a ton of cocaine. Let's make a commercial!"" - every furniture store owner"

"The espresso bar tech visited today... They adjusted my grind, turned up the heat, and blew out my steam wand."

"Have you seen www.quicksand.com? Yes but it hasn't sunk in yet."

"What's the difference... ...between Mick Jagger and an angry Scotsman? One says ""Hey, you, get off of my cloud!"" The other says ""Hey, McLeod, get off of my ewe!"""