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Joke of the Day
"What's the hardest thing about nailing a baby to a tree? My Penis."
Next Joke
"New, cuter name I came up with for dog shit: ""Snoopy poopy. """
"Actors can get political in speeches if they want. Go for it. But imagine someone winning Wimbledon & going, ""Yay! I won! Save the whales!"""
"What's the difference between a pick pocket and a peeping tom? One snatches watches..."
"Considering the yr Jesus is said to have been born, I question those who give him the wheel or make him their copilot."
"Twitterzoned (by Kevin L. Schwartz) Is ""Twitterzoning"" a thing? ""You're okay as a Twitter friend, but let's not get all Facebook about this."" You've been Twitterzoned."
"If horses could talk I reckon they'd mostly just say 'Get off me'."
"*goes to watch youtube vid* BUFFER well okay *lifts weights* *checks again* BUFFER *does steroids* BUFFER ""WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME"""
"My wife's fantasy is to be with another man. Mine is to have two girls at the same time. She must have misunderstood because now we have twin daughters from the mailman"
"What's the difference between a 100 year old and a 4 year old? What base you're counting in."