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Joke of the Day
"Girls always tell me I'm a chick magnet... ...set to repel."
Next Joke
"Why was the hipster wearing a sweater in July? Because he was cold before it was cool."
"Boyfriend and Girlfriend are at a baseball game the boyfriend leans over the girlfriend and says, ""I'll kiss you on the strikes, if you kiss me on the balls"""
"Why was the tomato blushing? Because it saw the salad dressing."
"whats the difference between a gay guy and a refrigerator the refrigerator doesn't fart when you take the meat out."
"Most men know that women dream of having two men at the same time. But they don't understand that in those fantasies one man is cleaning the house and the other one is cooking."
"The original Karate Kid is currently the same age as Mr. Miyagi was in the movie, 51. My youth just got crane kicked in the bean bag."
"LPT: Don't stand out too much from the group. Or you'll be a joke."
"[NSFW] Do you know who is the best at brushing their teeth? Adult males because they have experience at grasping a firm rod and moving it back and forth in a rapid motion."
"I had my first UFO experience this morning I walked into the kitchen and said to the missus ""Morning fat ass"". Next thing there were flying saucers coming at me from everywhere!"