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Joke of the Day

"So Hungry If Katniss Everdeen's friend Peeta got blown up, would the resulting crater be a Peeta pocket?"

"Arnold Schwarzenegger is actually a talented composer with a love for classical music! His newest album is titled, ""I'll Be Bach."""

"What do you call someone who likes to rap about salt? NaCl-more."

"Don't know whether to be disturbed or enchanted that the word sesquipedalian is onomatopoetic"

"I am much less afraid of jail when I'm drunk."

"No one ever mentions the 1000 miles of trouble free luxury cruising before the iceberg....."

"[wearing World's Best Dad shirt] Wife: whys there blood on your shirt? Me: its not my blood Guy bleeding out in the yard: its not your shirt"

"Why did the man use deodorant to fix a broken window? He read that it was an invisible solid."

"Q: Why did the girl loaf of stale bread slap the boy loaf of stale bread? A: Because he tried to get fresh."

"Me: ""I need a home improvement loan."" Banker: ""What will you be using the money for?"" Me: ""A divorce lawyer."""