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Joke of the Day

"I reverse engineered a time machine... Eureka!"

"How does every racist joke start? With looking over your shoulder."

"Seriously. Who gets ""regular strength"" ANYTHING?! ""Yeah, go ahead & gimme your middle-of-the-road shit. I'd like this headache to LINGER."""

"Frog COD What happens when Frogs die playing Call of Duty? They respawn."

"Don't know whether to be disturbed or enchanted that the word sesquipedalian is onomatopoetic"

"How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by the time she brings it to the couch."

"Two white guys, Tyronne and D'Andre, walk into a bar... What? That could happen, you racist!"

"Did you hear the joke about the blind prostitute? ...You really gotta hand it to her."

"The first messenger to say ""Don't kill the messenger"" definitely got killed in the face."

"A pirate walls into a bar And he has a ships wheel attached to his belt buckle. The bartender says ""what's with the ships wheel on your belt buckle?"" The pirate responds ""Aaarr! It's drivin me nuts!"""