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Joke of the Day

"Slash: Ok whats Paradise City like? Izzy: Pretty girls? ""Yeah!"" Axl: Nice lawns! ""Huh?"" Axl: Green grass! ""Grass is alw-"" Axl: JUST WRITE IT"

"There are only 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who don't."

"Let's all meet at BP headquarters and pee in their lobby."

"What is smaller than a teeny weenie fly? A fly's teeny weenie."

"Whitney Houston is 3 Years sober! Wow! Never thought it would happen"

"The Social Justice League doesn't have a Batmobile They have a tumbler."

"It's my favorite time of year, the time when everyone puts their clothes back on and goes inside."

"A man who is infatuated with soil... has a dirty fetish."

"""You fancy my best friend, don't you?"" asked my wife. ""If given the choice..."" I replied, ""I'd rather have sex with you then her."" ""You mean 'than'."" ""No."""

"Why is a marriage like a hurricane? They both start off sucking and blowing, but you end up losing your house."