171570

Joke of the Day

"Volkswagen should hire Arnold Schwarzenegger to deal with their emission scandal He's got experience with a Total Recall"

"your grandma has a pic of you in her house when you were in junior high and not at any other age"

"My future's so bright that I have to wear lampshades like an injured dog."

"Dodger Stadium announces they are now offering a limited edition Duggar Dog... The wiener is so big you can share it with your sister."

"What's the difference between a joke and two dicks? Redditors can't take a joke."

"What the best thing about pedophiles? They always drive slowly near schools"

"How are wearing Crocs like having butt sex with a guy? It feels really good until you look down and realize you're gay."

"Me: I heard Rihanna got food poisoning Brain: Stop M: It was B: No M: Salmonella ella ella ey ey B: This is why I can't do math in your head"

"What do you call a bear with no teeth? a GUMMY BEAR."

"If I ever lose a hand I'll replace it with a single nunchuck on a chain"