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Joke of the Day
"Want to hear a bird joke? Oops i forgot it. *Hawkward*."
Next Joke
"Hey girl, I've got a sex-Ed project due tomorrow... And I need a 69 to pass."
"Wife: The kids opened the ""private"" drawer in my nightstand. Me: THE drawer? Wife: Yeah. Great. There go our Oreos."
"Just bought a guitar. The sale felt a little dodgy, lots of strings attached."
"What's the downside of house arrest?"
"I was kicked out of karate class today for describing everything the instructor did as ""senseitational"""
"Return to empty house. TV turned on to UFC. Faint smell of Axe body spray. Worst fear realized. My house has polterguys."
"What's a ghost's favorite type of car? A Booghati"
"If I come to your house and you say ""make yourself at home"", don't get mad when I take my pants off and drink your beer."
"Nice try Asian guy in porns."