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Joke of the Day

"A man gets home and sees his wife pleasuring herself with a cucumber ""What are you doing?"" he shouts, ""I have to eat that later, and I don't want it tasting like cucumber!"""

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"What is Son Goku's least liked food? Vegetta balls"
"My laboratory assistant has invented a device that allows you to steal other people's ideas and then permanently delete them from the subject's memory. Why didn't I think of that?"
"What did one snake say to another ? Hiss off !"
"Why did the monkey paint his balls red? So he could hide in the cherry tree... What's the most load noise in the jungle? ... A giraffe eating cherries!"
"I want a romantic comedy trailer that starts, ""Ben was looking for love in all the wrong places,"" and then shows Ben digging up a grave."
"Some kid on xbox live told me he had *** with my mom I told him my mother has AIDS."
"""Genetically modified food is very much safe for human consumption"" the tomato on my plate reassuringly explained to me."
"i jacked off into the toilet and tried to flush but the cum seems to always stay afloat..... well,what do you know...... I got great swimmers!!!"
"How many optimists does it take to change a light bulb? Who says it's dark?"