171049

Joke of the Day

"Tomorrow is Fathers Day. I heard iPad accessories are the big thing for Father's Day this year. I got my dad a leather case, a screen protector and a new charger. If he ever gets an iPad he's all set."

"What do you call cheap circumcision? A ripoff."

"Mosquitoes use a numbing agent so we feel no pain from their bites. This is one easy way to tell if you were bitten by a mosquito or a shark"

"What did the diabetic's girlfriend call him as pet name? Sweet pee."

"Q: How many buddhists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Three - one to change it, one to not-change it and one to both change-and not-change it."

"What is the worst part about the Orlando massacre? Finding out that your son was gay."

"What did the chicken say after it's wings caught on fire? ""Damn, I sure got some hot wings!"""

"Time really flies by. Seems like only yesterday I was just a young apprentice-bater."

"What did the owner of the Indian restaurant say when he burned all of his bread? ""Don't worry, it's a naan issue."""

"I'm happiest when people tell me ""Don't be a hero"" because there's absolutely no way I'm going to disappoint them."