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Joke of the Day

"""Sir, do you have any dietary restrictions?"" *unbuttons pants* ""Not anymore!"""

Next Joke
 
"How is a girlfriend like a pronoun? Your's is possessive"
"If there's a pedicure, why are there still pedophiles?"
"Why are they rioting in Ferguson? Because they carefully and objectively reviewed the evidence from the trial and thought a legitimate injustice had been done."
"TIFU by hiring a footlong sandwich as a replacement teacher. Oops, wrong sub."
"[My Wedding] Me: I do Guests: Awww Me: Or do I? Guests: Ooooo"
"There are three rings that come with every marriage... First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, and lastly the suffering."
"Two mens are under a tent Two men are under a tent when one of them ask the second one: -Are you masturbating? -Yes why? -Then can you use your penis instead of mine?"
"What does velcro yell as it charges into battle? ATTACH!"
"What is a black mans favorite Halloween costume? Robbin Hood"