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Joke of the Day
"My parents said I should watch less movies and read more,so I turned on the subtitles.."
Next Joke
"My girlfriends nervous about giving birth. I said don't worry, women have been doing it for over 100,000 years.. .. Or in the case of Republicans, women have been doing it for 6,000 years or less"
"Do you think horses feel remorse? They have such long faces."
"Don't be stupid, if their ex is still calling it's because they're still getting an answer."
"What did a police officer write in the criminal report, when they found a homey from the bottom of a lake, wrapped in 200 kg's of metal chains? -Offender stole more than he could carry by swimming"
"I'd attend church a lot more if, instead of a tiny cracker, the body of Christ was a tiny quesadilla."
"""Push harder"" I shouted at my wife while she was in labor... ""Screw you"" she screamed back at me. Bit harsh I thought...... it wasn't my fault the car broke down on the way to the hospital!"
"Dating tip: Walk up to a girl in a club, smile, look into her eyes, take her hand and walk away. If she wants her hand back, she'll find you"
"My dog failed puppy school. He was always wagging class."
"How many Germans does it take to change a light bulb? Not zri, but fuehrer."