170115

Joke of the Day

"My wife asked me: ""What's the most risky, dangerous food you've ever eaten."" Me: ""wedding cake""."

"Why did the rabbit eat lunch under the sink? He found a leek there."

"Doctors have just identified a food that can cause grief & suffering years after it's been eaten. It's called a Wedding Cake!!"

"I tried to duck it, but I just wasn't quack! enough."

"Why did Ayn Rand lose the pool tournament? She wouldn't play on a regulation size table"

"If Kim Kardashian & Snooki were drowning & I could only save one, I'd have a hard time deciding whether to make a sandwich or take a nap."

"Did you hear about the blind guy who got in a car accident? He regained his sight in ICU."

"My daughter has reached that age where she's asking embarrassing questions about sex Just this morning she said, ""Daddy, is that the best that you can do?"""

"On a scale of 1 to 10, how immature am I? 69"

"""Penguins mate for life. Isn't that romantic?"" You open your mouth to answer but I spit my chewed up cake into it. ""You're my penguin."""