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Joke of the Day

"How Many Hipsters Does it Take to Screw in a Lightbulb? A: You probably wouldn't know, it's some really obscure number..."

"I did some Star War's fantasy roll playing this weekend Me, Hand Solo and Princess Didn't-Get-Laid-a."

"So, what're all of us fortunate people complaining about today?"

"Bill Cosby awarded another honorary degree from Boston University, this time is was Anesthesiology."

"I put the whiskey in another room ... Exercise regimen established."

"Are one-liners accepted? I immediately stopped telling people I was xenophobic when I realized it doesn't mean ""afraid of xenomorphs""."

"Never do a parachute jump with your girlfriend... Do it with a parachute."

"What do you call a smoothie that came out too thick? A chunky. Credit to my dad this morning.."

"Just been fined 500 for having a joint in my greenhouse. I guess people in glass houses shouldn't get stoned."

"Why are there no Bruce Lee jokes? Because Bruce Lee is no joke."