169503
Joke of the Day
"It's like my fridge sends texts inviting all my friends over the moment I fill it up."
Next Joke
"I'd be calmer defusing a bomb after four Red Bulls than watching someone else use my laptop."
"Don't ""psh"" me, Coca Cola I just opened."
"What's the difference between Bill and Hillary Clinton? One wants their aides to keep their mouth closed, the other wants them to keep their mouth open."
"What do you call someone whose GPA is greater than the number of inches their dick is? Asian"
"Donuts 360GlazeitFaggot"
"Dammit, stop summoning me to fight global warming! I'll believe it when the remaining 3% of scientists believe it! -Republican Capt. Planet"
"Hey Paul Ryan, why don't you save some first names for the rest of us."
"Why did the spelling bee champ have to go to rehab? He was hooked on phonics."
"What did the one eyed thief, with a hook for a hand, call the elven princess? Arrrrrrr-wen"