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Joke of the Day

"[sees kid crying] Kid: Im lost Me: that's ok. We're all lost. Happiness is an illusion. Life is meaningless. Death is around the corner. Bye"

"Why do black people have nightmares? Because we killed the only one that had a dream"

"If your ex wife, and ex mother in law were drowning and you could only save one.. What kind of sandwich would you make?"

"Tomorrow is Saturday... ...that means i only have to worry about work, i don't have to actually be there."

"Why was the broom late? Because he overswept."

"Watching a cooking show when ""We believe this was the last dish they served on the Titanic on that fateful day"" I bet that went down well."

"How does the Moon get its haircut? Eclipse it!"

"[Home after awful day at work, my dog greets me] Me: At least somebody's happy to see me! Dog: *shakes head, pulls banana from pocket*"

"What are a philosopher's favorite type of chips? Plato Nachos"

"What version of windows does Jesus use? XP Edit: [Explanation](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chi_Rho)"