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Joke of the Day

"There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live."

"Adulthood is just piles of bills and trying to convince your exes how amazing you're life is."

"I just had my fence destroyed by a tornado, and I am asking for your help I heard we have a lot of experts in re-posting here."

"is it crazy how saying sentences backwards . . . . . .create backwards sentences saying how crazy it is?"

"My girlfriend told me that she's sick of me pretending I'm a cat Girlfriend: ""I'm sick of you pretending you're a cat. I packed your bags. I want you to go."" Me: ""Wait, are you kicking MEEEOOWWT???"""

"Don't worry, everyone else is as confused as you, I swear."

"It's World Breastfeeding Week and, honestly, babies need to eat more often than that."

"How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it!"

"My mom passed earlier today. It's sad of course, but I know one day she'll stop and say ""Hi."""

"Don't be silly, I'm not objectifying women. I'm not sexually attracted to objects."