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Joke of the Day

"I know she's talking about rain but I don't like hearing my mom say she got 6 inches"

"What covers the outside of a dogwood tree? Bark."

"TIFU by getting fired from the calendar factory. All I did was take a day off."

"A piece of ham Ham is ham. The end"

"CUT, CUT!! [Music stops] LOOK IT'S A WESTERN MUSICAL [Rubs temples] YOU HAVE TO KEEP THE COWBOY HAT ON- [Cat runs off] Meow!"

"why did the lobster refuse to help anyone else? because he's shellfish"

"Why did the man that drank 10 cups of poisoned Lipton not die? He drank so much poison it built his immuni-tea."

"1. Invite snowmen into your conference room. 2. Turn up heat. 3. Negotiate on YOUR terms."

"Pizza is like racism. America didn't invent it, but it's hard to find a country that does it better."

"What's the internal body temperature of a tauntaun? Luke warm."