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Joke of the Day

"one of the tvs at this bar is showing hockey and the other is showing an infomercial for a blender and more people are watching the blender"

"Guess what? Dickbutt"

"A blonde asks her brunette friend... ... ""Didn't you get an HIV test last week?"" ""Yeah, it came back negative"" answered the brunette The blonde responds ""Maybe you should study next time"""

"Took my Grandma to a nibble fish spa.. It's cheaper than burial or cremation!"

"Never pretend to be something you're not. Unless you're pretending to be sober, in which case that's probably a good idea. Keep doing that."

"#rubbishjokes Noah's diary - 39th day: ""The dragon pie was really scrumptious."""

"Mountains aren't just funny. They're hill areas."

"I personally don't believe in bros before hoes or hoes before hoes.. There needs to be a balance. A homie-hoe-stasis"

"My doctor said I had 2 months to live So I shot him, the judge gave me 30 years"

"there has been a shooting at the Westboro Baptist church... police report 3 dozen cheerful bystanders, yet nobody claims to have seen who did it."