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Joke of the Day

"You're in a room with a murderer and someone who makes sandwiches with the crust end of the bread and you have 1 bullet. Who do- ""Bread guy"""

"I was at a gas station and I accidentally filled up my escort with diesel. She died."

"I bet Ryan Gosling doesn't even blow his candles out. He probably just winks at them and they faint."

"""French court stops child from being named Nutella"" They've stopped a silly name before it can spread."

"William Howard Taft was so fat... ...he sat in TWO branches of the federal government."

"What do you get when you cross a JOKE with a RHETORICAL QUESTION?"

"Wearing sunglasses inside is a great way to let people know that you should be hated unconditionally"

"There is an existential horror upon seeing your password in handwriting."

"On bad days I like to take a pregnancy test to remind myself that things could be much worse."

"How did the constipated mathematician solve the problem? He worked out with a pencil."