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Joke of the Day

"Variants for running. Variants for running:- 1. Hot girl in front of you. 2. Creepy guy behind you. (If 1 applies to you, you're probably 2)"

"Why do the Lannisters have such large beds? They put two twins together to make a king."

"What do you call a corn farmer who had his genitals removed A eunuch corn"

"Anyone heard of that movie ""Constipation""? It hasn't come out yet though. ...."

"Every time you have McDonald's as a kid, it's a victory. Every time you have it as an adult, it's a defeat."

"Today I found out what it feels like to be discriminated against. I was unfairly labeled a scrub JUST because I was hanging out the passenger side of my best friend's ride."

"What's the difference between Sarah Palin's mouth and Sarah Palin's vagina? Only one fifth of what comes out of her vagina is retarded."

"It took my wife six hours to push out our first child. The fat bastard can live elsewhere now."

"What do you call someone who tells too many lame dinosaur jokes? I dino-bore! . I'm sorry."

"I invited my girlfriend to go to the gym with me, then I didn't show... I hope she gets the message that we aren't working out."