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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between an introverted scientist and an extroverted scientist? An extroverted scientist will stare at YOUR feet."

"Just found out I was dating a commie Guess I should've noticed the red flags earlier"

"How do punctuation marks get freaky? The comma sutra"

"What's black, white, black, white, black, brown, black brown, black, black, black, black, black? A nun on a spit"

"Watching ""Wizard of Oz"". I'd forgotten how the neighbor wants to kill Toto and Auntie Em and Uncle Henry were fine with it. Family fun!"

"How do you know your fridge is going through menopause? It's all out of eggs.."

"My husband told me he'd like to be woken up by a blowjob... ...so I put my dick in his mouth to wake him up."

"What did the gold miner say when he met the singer of Pink Floyd? Au"

"What does Jerry Sandusky and a Silver Medalist have in common? They both came in a little behind!"

"One of my stuffed animals just told me I should get back on my meds, I guess someone doesn't want to be part of tea party club anymore."