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Joke of the Day

"Watching ""Wizard of Oz"". I'd forgotten how the neighbor wants to kill Toto and Auntie Em and Uncle Henry were fine with it. Family fun!"

"What do you call a stolen Tesla? An Edison."

"What did Jay Z say to Beyonce after having an ice cream shoved up his arse? I'm feeling a bit sorbet."

"""It's a boy!"" ...he screamed, ""it's a boy!"". Tears rolling down his face, and he vowed to never go back to Thailand."

"Finding out a gay guy has a crush on you is like finding 1,000,000 pesos. You'll think ""Well, I can't do much with this right now, but if I ever cross that line I'll be just fine"""

"What is the one thing Spiderman can't eat? Uncle Bens rice."

"""There's Dave"" Regular Dave or Dave who thinks he's a hotdog and ""f"" is a vowel? [cut to Dave writing in a book titled ""Diary of an frank""]"

"Why is it called the ""color TV""? Because it was invented by a black person!"

"What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles *It's a verbal joke.*"

"My dog kept digging holes in the back yard... ..so I hide all the shovels"