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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A trampoline doesn't look adorable in a sailor outfit"

"What do you call a horny square? Erectangle"

"If you've ever wondered which of your friends loved V for Vendetta, you're in luck today."

"How many PETA members does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because PETA can't change anything. -A joke I found inside the game manual for Super Meat Boy for Steam."

"So the Dalai Lama walks into a pizza shop And he says ""Can you make me one with everything"""

"Ted Cruz thinks: 1. Presidents should pray every day 2. More prayers the better 3. Muslims pray 5x day 4. Ted Cruz wants a Muslim president."

"How do you tell which plumber went home for lunch? He's the one with the clean finger."

"Apparently even if you delete the drunk text messages you sent last night from your phone, the other person can still see them."

"In 'One Really Long Metal Claw' (the bear version of 'Hook'), what did Captain Onereallylongmetalclaw really hate? Clawcks."

"My brain is like the Bermuda Triangle Information goes in, but is often never found again"