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Joke of the Day
"What do you say to a virgin when she sneezes? Goesintight"
Next Joke
"If I wear a wizard hat and robe to my cousin's wedding this weekend, I bet no one asks me if I'm next."
"Hot air rises That explains why Donald Trump is so popular."
"Why did the nun get a free hot dog at the fair? Because she spontaneously performed fellatio on the hot dog salesman. This made him feel charitable."
"Why are Americans bad at league of legends? Because they can't defend their towers!...i'm gonna get stabbed"
"Did you hear they're making an Indiana Jones 5? How can they do that?! They haven't released a fourth!"
"Ordering a cake over the phone ""And what would you like the cake to say?"" [covers phone to ask wife] ""Honey, do we want a talking cake?"""
"I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom... ...until they are flashing behind you."
"My new Thesaurus arrived today, and it's terrible. And another thing, it's terrible."
"Doctor, my girlfriend grinds her teeth while sleeping. Dr: Put some coffee beans in her mouth and set the alarm for 7:30am"