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Joke of the Day

"Why did the boy call 911 when his father ran a red light? He didn't want to go home early and do his homework!"

"I was having dinner with a snowman... The other day I was having dinner with a snowman, and he says ""Am I crazy, or does it smell like carrots in here?"""

"Anyone still keeping up with their New Year's resolutions? I am... Still 1080p"

"Why are glasses required to do math? because you need it for davision"

"What does a mechanic do during a 1 night stand? He screws, nuts, and bolts"

"How does the china man say ""wrong""? he says ""wong"""

"How can you tell when a politician is lying? His lips are moving."

"What do you call a reptile detective ? An investigator Sorry"

"Nu Finish makes a Scratch Doctor to get unwanted scratches out of your car... They should make a Biatch Doctor!"

"I know 3 people who are clinically insane: Me."