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Joke of the Day

"Why did the boy call 911 when his father ran a red light? He didn't want to go home early and do his homework!"

"What is the difference between a Mountain Lion and a Guppy? A Guppy likes to muck around the fountain; a Lion likes to fuck around the Mountain."

"The Reddit team fired Victoria without telling anyone why. I guess you could say it is Victoria's Secret"

"They say a blowjob makes your day... ...but anal makes your whole week."

"Cats are so lucky. Nobody thinks twice when they run from company and hide under the bed. I do it and its ""weird""."

"I heard laughter is the best medicine, so I went to the local hospital, found some cancer patients, and laughed at them."

"Superman: How'd you know? Lex: Know what? S: My secret identity! L: Whaddya mean? S: You called me a KENT!! L: That's NOT what I called you."

"Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away for North Korea's long range missiles."

"Instead of a blue or pink balloon for a gender reveal.. A piggy bank should be smashed revealing $1 for a boy or 78 cents for a girl."

"I'm so out of it I just asked my dog to hand me something. To be fair, he gave me the same blank stare my kids would have."