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Joke of the Day
"Yelling out ""Stranger Danger!"" is a good way to say no when a cashier asks for your zip code."
Next Joke
"Auto correct makes me say things I didn't Nintendo."
"When someone asks me how my day is, I like to say ""Still kinda pissed about Hiroshima,"" & then start swearing in Japanese."
"They say you should never run when you stumble across a lion in the wild. I don't think I'll be able to run with all the shit in my pants."
"I'm not usually a prick but when I am, I try to be like Donald Trump"
"What did the wise man say to the science class? Many photons make light work."
"Why did Siegfried and Roy close their bakery? A batch of Tiger bread turned on them."
"Hey movie villains - make a bomb where the wires are all one color."
"If you type a <3 but you end up with < you should go to the doctor because your heart is pounding."
"The real reason Darth Vader cut off Luke's hand was because he touched the thermostat"