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Joke of the Day

"do you ever start rubbing your eyes and then it feels really good and you can't stop so it's like eye masturbation"

"*opens facebook messenger* *sips mtn dew twice* *strokes neckbeard* *begins typing* Sorry abt ur mom dying Tis a shame Btw ur attractive"

"What did the Banana say to the other Banana? You're very appealing"

"At Dunkin Donuts- 8: Can I get choc. milk? Me: We have that at home. 8: We have coffee at home too... Me: WHO TAUGHT YOU LOGICAL THINKING?!"

"What do you get when you combine a rhetorical question and a joke?"

"I love the Olympics, but missing Dateline due to the Olympics sucks. One of these athletes better end up being a serial killer or something."

"Sometimes I feel like a semi-colon I don't know where I belong ;"

"I wish I was a girl So I can use my menstruation cycle as my calendar."

"I got an escort for my grandpa's 100th birthday. She said that she would give him super sex. He said ""I'll take the soup."""

"Ghetto Word Of The Day: Cologne ""Ay, you think you cologne me a dollar or two?"""