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Joke of the Day

"What is the best part about raping a midget? Their arms are too short to hold you back."

"Me: I'm so tired. Phone: Put me down and go to sleep. Me and Phone: HAHAHAHAHA!"

"You see those cows over there? They are outstanding in their field."

"What's the difference between matter and a hormone? You can't make matter."

"Knock Knock Who's there ? Colin ! Colin who ? Colin all cars Colin all cars !"

"Why did the cook go to jail? He was caught beating the egg"

"You know what I hate? People that start their statements with rhetorical questions."

"So, there's a plane... So there's a plane. The plane crashes, and every single person dies. However, a man goes home and tells his wife about it. How is this possible? He wasn't single."

"""911 what's your emergency?"" - I've been catfished by a dozen men ""We're on our way"" - Gonna arrest them? ""Gonna shut off your internet"""

"So if Mary had Jesus, and Jesus was the Lamb of God... ... Does that mean Mary had a little lamb?"