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Joke of the Day

"What is the best part about raping a midget? Their arms are too short to hold you back."

"Sometimes I put my cat in the sunroom hoping the coyote who lives out back will charge at it and bounce off the glass."

"What does have eyes but can't see, has legs but can't walk, and has wings but can't fly? A dead bird."

"Where do sad Ukrainians go? Crimea River."

"What is it called when you butt dial from your front pocket? A cockadial"

"Kim Jong-un promises a new clear future for North Korea Oops, spelt nuclear wrong."

"Why do Puerto ricans have so many kids? Because pulling out is work!!!"

"I'll get you socks and a dildo for your birthday. So if you don't like the socks, you can go fuck yourself"

"Yo Mama soooo old she was wearing a Jesus starter jacket!"

"First came up with this joke when I was 5 and it's still the funniest thing I've ever said. Q. What do you call a line of Barbies? A. A Barbecue!"