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Joke of the Day

"Facebook Friend: I woke up at 3:30am so I could sneak in a 8 mile run. Me: I skipped showering so I could sleep an extra 15 minutes."

"What do spinach and anal sex have in common? If it's been forced on you as a child, you won't like it as an adult."

"I once made an apathetic club. No one cared enough to attend the meetings, though."

"a kiss makes your day, but anal sex maks your hole weak"

"How do you get an anorexic to gain 25 pounds? Marry her."

"What's a tongue twister? When your tang gets all tongueled up."

"There was an old lady at a ATM today, she asked me if I could help check her balance. So I pushed her over."

"Just saw myself naked in a full length mirror, and I had an epiphany. Either someone in my family tree had sex with the baboon or pissed off a gypsy."

"Million Dollar Idea: Teach pugs to DJ, create a new genre of music...pugstep."

"If - H 2 O - is on the inside of a fire hydrant what is on the outside? K 9 P"