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Joke of the Day

"I have a solution to procrastination I will tell you tomorrow"

"Today feminists asked me how I view lesbians Apparently ""in HD"" wasn't the right answer."

"What did Tony Abbott (Prime minister of Australia) do with the half-eaten banana? He re-peeled it."

"Why do we call it politics? Because poly means many and ticks mean blood-sucking parasites."

"Orange is the new white rest are black."

"Him:Dude, I went on one of those police ride alongs with my friend..it was awesome! You ever done that? Me: In the front or back of the car?"

"Who's the wost president ever? Guess we'll find out in January."

"A man was arrested for having sex inside a West Virginian Olive Garden with an employee. Apparently he took ""When you're here, you're family"" too literally."

"""Don't make me regret this."" -things I think when accepting a friend request."

"The love I feel for my family is always constant. My tolerance is another matter."