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Joke of the Day
"If you want to be remembered when you die... Borrow money from everyone you know"
Next Joke
"So I Was Going to Kill Myself But I hear whales are endangered."
"The Vatican has dispelled rumors that the Pope is resigning because he's a pedophile. They claim he just got a little behind at work."
"[phone sex] GF: Tell me you want me ME: I want you badly GF: How badly? ME: I want you [checking thesaurus in a panic] haphazardly"
"""Wow, that was a very good sandwich."" - Liam Neeson, at some point, probably"
"No evidence is good enough for a Creationist... But no evidence is good enough for a Creationist."
"SPOILERS: Finding Dory was just a Movie.... about her for getting home."
"What did the African eat for breakfast? Ebola cereal. (A bowl of)"
"What does the arabs put in their Mexican food?? Allah-penos"
"Why is the fridge shaking so much? It's running just fine. Probrably because it's so turned on!"