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Joke of the Day

"Do you want to hear a joke about a psychologist? - Yes. - Why?"

"Actually, I'd rather you shut your talk-hole, not your pie-hole. If you have a hole that gives pie, I'm going in there, because HELLO PIE."

"Why should you never invest in bakeries? Because they have a high turnover rate."

"Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool so I decided to give him a glass of water."

"When life gives you melons... ...you may be dyslexic."

"I wish it were okay for a guy to carry a purse because there is only so much banana bread that I can fit in my wallet."

"LPT before weighing yourself, take a poop... You'll weigh a shit load less."

"I like to skip my digestive system and just place my Chipotle burrito directly into my toilet."

"What did the porn actress say when she opened the door? Make sure to come upstairs."

"My parents are in town and said they'd be at my house in ten minutes, and I'm wondering if that's enough time to build a moat."