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Joke of the Day

"""I heard you have unlimited breadsticks?"" Sure do, table for 1? ""Quack!"" Wait a second *trench coat falls, family of ducks run away*"

"RIP boiled water You will be mist"

"What did the Eskimo lady ask her husband when they were having sex? Are you even Inuit?"

"I have the heart of a lion.. ..and a lifetime ban from the Toronto Zoo"

"Did you hear about the idiot who filled out an employment application? In the blank labeled ""Church Preference"" he filled in: Red brick."

"please spread kale over my dumb organic gluten free casket"

"If your uncle Jack was riding a horse named Bill Cosby, and your uncle got stuck on the horse, would you help your uncle Jack off Bill Cosby?"

"How come lesbians can't be vegan? They all eat pussy."

"I went on a long bicycle ride yesterday. Farcical?"

"I bought a LazyBoy chair last year It's still in the package"