163733

Joke of the Day

"I hate political jokes And it disgusts me that two are running for president."

"Pal: That's an impressive stingray. How'd you catch it? Me:*flashes back to being dressed as girl stingray* You know, the regular way."

"What's blue, small and sits in a corner? A baby with its hand in the power socket."

"Why did Eeyore cross the road? To get to the other... *sigh*"

"For me sex is like a game singleplayer"

"Customer: Couldn't you see I was going bald? Barber: No the shine from your head blinded me."

"What do you call an Irishman who's had eight beers? The designated driver."

"And the award for best neckwear goes to... Well, would you look at that...it's a tie."

"What is a vampires least favorite food? Steak! ...I'll see myself out now."

"I came up with an excuse for being late I was marching with Martin Luther King, but then some firemen mistook us for fire and tried to put us out; that's why I was late sorry."