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Joke of the Day

"What does Bill say to Hillary after sex? Honey I'll be home in 20 minutes."

"What's it called when you look in the mirror and say ""jesus christ I look good""? Using the lords name in vanity"

"Told my wife that joining the Mile High Club is on my bucket list. She said she didn't give a flying fuck."

"My wife wanted something that went from 0 to 200 in a few seconds for christmas So I bought her a nice sports car."

"In theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there is."

"Knock Knock. Who's rhere?. 9/11. 9/11 Who? You said you would never forget."

"(._.) ( I: ) (.-.) ( :I ) (._.) They see me rollin', they hatin'"

"You can't run a country like a business. If you did, you'd have to pay profits to investors, meaning citizens. And that's socialism! Bye!"

"My father owned a body removal business He lifted a lot of dead weight"

"kid who doesn't believe in Santa What do you call a kid who doesn't believe in Santa? A rebel without a Claus."